hi i'm collin im 17, nj, and i live off of microwavable mozzarella sticks
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britanymurphy:

me at a straight boy’s house 

venusian-eyes:

buttsbutts:

Get it because it’s a CELL WALL

oh my god

basedgosh:

*pretends to understand the movie reference you just made*

Anonymous asked: You're Australia?! What? I had no idea.. .-.

meladoodle:

Yes. Its all true. I am the entire country of Australia.

apple-str1der:

tips for new freshmen!

  • no one cares about anything
  • walk on the right side of the fucking hallway 
  • dont sit in the back of the bus you gotta earn that. maybe next year, champ.
  • stop screaming. we’re all tired and miserable. 
  • GIVE ME MY LUNCH TABLE BACK 

sourbud1993:

megustamemes:

Bank teller laughing at robber.

She like wtf this nigga gon do wit that lmao

heckitygirl:

i love drunk girls in bathrooms so much like they’re just so nice they tell u how pretty u are and become ur bff for like those two minutes that ur standing there in the bathroom its great

surprisebitch:

*calls 911*

911: hello, 911, what is your emergency?

me: help!! i lost my virginity!!

911: um im sorry.. but.. i dont think..

me: no, i lost my pet, “virginity” its name is virginity !

911: ohhh! xD

me: xD

yaridansei19:

Damn Family Guy may be stupid sometimes…but this shit is on. Point.

in a couple of generations nobody will know how to read an analog clock

sherlockedgallifreyanofasgard:

hannahbelle-lecter:

whisperingsweetsins:

whenblackwasinvogue:

shego:

she put up a video of her telling miyah that she thinks she’s very pretty without the wig too and that playing dress up is fun but to promise to stay in school

Love this!

Stories you won’t see in the media

#nicki is so protective of young girls#this needs to be underlined more#also she gives them edited versions of her albums#magical girls protect other girls#bless nicki

You can hate someone’s music and love them as a person. This is one of those cases for me.